How to Stop Working All the Time
Implement Lessons from Vacation
I have a problem with overwork.
I don’t know if it’s because I work for myself, I work from home alone, or I’m addicted to my phone.
For whatever the reason, it is So. Hard. For. Me. To Turn. Off.
(For example, I’m writing this post at 6:30 on a Saturday morning.)
I recently went on vacation at an all-inclusive resort. I thought I’d have nothing to do so I brought my computer thinking I’d write 3-5 blog posts for Happy Asian Woman.
To my delight, I ended up spending time with friends and family, swam and did yoga, and spent 4 hours a day eating. (Did I mention it was an all-inclusive resort?? Perfect vacay for moms of young kids.)
I left my phone in the room most of the time except for the last day, when a friend from home told me to take pictures.
I was so relaxed and happy I barely thought about work and did not write a single word for any of my blogs.
Upon returning home, I immediately dove back into work because it’s busy season with my college admission consulting students.
Three days after returning home, I ended up with a tense neck and shoulder (bad ergonomic work station) and had a debilitating headache that lasted roughly 8 hours even with medication.
The incident got me thinking, how can I incorporate more of my vacation habits at home?
Ditch My Phone More
When I was on vacation, I did not bring my phone out of the hotel room. I did not miss it and even forgot it existed.
When I returned to the hotel room, unfortunately, I would immediately get sucked into my phone for an hour or two, reading my favorite websites (But I didn’t check email on vacation!)
When I’m at home I am on my phone an average of 4-5 hours a day. I work very part time and rarely use my phone for work.
Why am I on my phone so much?
I pick it up mainly when I’m bored and want to read, or I want to reach out to a friend. The friend part is good, the boredom part can and should be fixed through other means, like a book.
I need to get more books and put them strategically around the house (on top of my phone, perhaps?)
Upon returning home I also experimented with not taking my phone on walks, and instead using my daughter’s watch. It was freeing not to check my phone every few minutes to figure out the time.
I need to get a watch.
Get Out of The House
The other thing that really helped on vacation is to not be at home all the time.
When I’m at home I see everything that “needs” to be done.
Dishes? Check.
Declutter? Check.
Food prep? Check.
Hmm… I wonder if I am working on my paid work in order to avoid doing unpaid, never ending housework?
Maybe.
For whatever the reason, I get the feeling I am working to escape something.
I recently picked up The CBT Workbook for Perfectionism and started glancing through it. Of course every single descriptor of perfectionism caused me to say “Yes”.
The book said one trait of perfectionism is to equate our value with our productivity. The question it left me pondering is… “What would happen if you didn’t work?”
I am still thinking about that one.
Honestly, I’m not sure how I’d fill my time because the workbook said even if we aren’t doing paid work, perfectionists fill their time with household labor and other projects.
Maybe I need to schedule more vacations.
Are you good at resting? How do you not overwork?
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Good points. I think one important mindset to cultivate is that our value as a person, should be measured based on our personally-held moral values and beliefs. Our value should be based more on what type of person we are, in that sense, instead of how productive we are in our lives.